Friday, April 15, 2016

A flashback

How important a flashback for me?
Sometimes we need a flashback to remind ourselves that we're ever be someone worse, or probably the better. I suddenly remember that I could do so many things in the old days, the days of my own, everything was about me, only me. 

Today is different, it's like the things I had have been forgotten. Time had brought me this far and I never realized it 'till today. I read my old blog post and realized that I was that good in some things I can't do today, that the old me was even better than myself today.

Tonight, I decided to sleep late. I want to review my life and what achievements I've got. Things may be quite different from yesterday. Today, I'm a mother, a wife, a housewife, everything that I was afraid of in the past. 

I was a web author, although, I know I'm not a good author. But at least I could make an article in 30minutes (that day the boss asked me to write an article and he would wait until it finish). So, today I'll start writing again, to honor myself, yet not to let other people from other departments take my part (bcuz the boss way so much better than me in writing that time).

I did midnight praying in the past, while these days I sleep late and wake up only for my baby. I was a girl wearing boring clothes my mom chose for me, and a postman bag that costed really cheap. Today, I'm able to purchase that designer's hand-made blazer with beads and rhinestones, but what's its use if I'm only a housewife, staying at home for 24x5 hours a week? 

Finally, I realize that knowledge and taqwa are the beads, blinks, the jewels I used to dream about, and I must keep it stay with me forever. This is for AJ, and for myself off course.

Bring me back to the past bring me back to the past!